Boys, Take Responsibility For Misogyny


I think the most insidious element of misogyny is the tendency for self proclaimed ‘decent men’ to completely wipe their hands of the problem, blindly assuming that their good intentions have absolved them of any responsibility. So here’s the thing: YOU are totally responsible for misogyny. YOU are complicit, YOU are benefiting. Things YOU have done were misogynistic. You’re not innocent just because you’re not a rapist. There will be limited progress on the issue until men stop assuming their own innocence. I fucking did it. I have contributed. Especially if you finished your adolescence prior to web 2.0. Misogyny is in your bones, just like 90s music is.

If you don’t look fearlessly at your own ideals and actions, constantly forever, then you will be complicit. It’s so easy to be. After all, we are the ones who stand to benefit from misogyny. It was designed for us. We cannot get all butt-hurt when “sexism” is directed back towards us. To assume misandry is to undermine the voices of an oppressed class. The shit storm around Jacquie Lambie’s comments last week highlight this, as eloquently pointed out here by Clementine Ford. That sort of subversion is NOT equal to nor analogous to misogyny, and is a completely necessary tool in the establishment of a more equal norm. It is often said that all people acting with docile respect towards one another is the solution to this problem. But what that really means is, so long as men play nice, then women should continue to be subservient. Business as usual. It’s like Back to the Future 2. If we travel forward in time from this timeline, where Biff owns a casino…

In order to create a future of equality, the old norms need to be torn down. It cannot be done by everyone just playing nice. Playing nice favours the establishment. Drop all of your defences. YOU are responsible. I am responsible. Listen, learn, shut up, and change.

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